Creative Writing

So I had today off and I was cleaning my room. I came across an old assignment that I completed in Grade 11 English. I'm not exactly sure what the point of that assignment was, but to this day I have no idea what I was thinking when I wrote this story:

Marianne's Trip

There once was a girl named Marianne who was told only to walk on the left side of the road, facing traffic, so she could see any danger coming towards her. She was a bright and cheerful girl who did as she was told, always looking with every step.

One day, on a warm spring morning, she was walking along to the hardware store (why???), left side as usual, to buy her father some nails (again, why???). A slight wind blew her long, black hair into her face. As she was pushing it out of the way, she heard shouting coming from an open window. It seemed to grow louder as she walked and finally she stopped at a dainty little house with blue shutters and a wide porch.

Marianne was hesitant to stay and listen, but her mother had always told her not to stick her nose into other people's business. Still, she was curious, so she lingered around for a couple of minutes. Soon the shoulting stopped and she decided to move on. Marianne was about to leave, but she noticed that her shoe was untied. As she bent over to tie it, a heavyset man with broad shoulders burst out the door running, causing the little girl to trip over her laces and fall into the street. "Why is this happening?", Marianne thought. "I'm supposed to see any danger that comes. Mother was wrong!".

She struggled to get up in a sitting position; the man, who was carrying something under his arm, headed across the once quiet street. From the house, a woman cried out, "Stop him! He's taken my stuff!" She pointed at the man, who ran towards some trees. Marianne stood up and brushed herself off just to see the man half turn and shout, "Look where you're going, little kid."

The End


Maybe the exercise was to write about something totally pointless.

Mom Pt. 5

We're eating dinner. I have a National Geographic open to a spread on the great grey owl (don't ask me why, it was just sitting on the kitchen table).

Mom: "Hey, it looks like you."
Me: (wha?.....)
Mom: "Yeah, wise eyes ..... and a big head."
Me: "THANKS MOM."

Later on, watching the Golden Globes.....

Mom: "Wow, she's fat - I mean she's tall"

Early Dementia

So....last week was my first week back to work since an 11 day hiatus for the holidays. I was supposed to have joined a book club, which is kind of ironic, because it literally takes me 6 months or more to read a book sometimes. This book club is a combined book and movie club, where you read a book that is related to or written before the movie came out. Having found a suitable excuse to not attend the first meeting on January 4th (1. working that night; 2. book was sold out at the store)....I felt somewhat relieved. And mind you, those were real excuses - no lying involved! So anyways, I'm sitting at the table yesterday during a seminar and the other people in the book club are talking about meeting up to discuss a book. I thought...wow, you guys have already finished reading the SECOND book?? A few confused sentences later, I find out that no, they were talking about the first book and no, they didn't have the meeting on January 4th.

"Why? Could no one make it to the meeting?"
"No...what? The meeting's tomorrow"
"Huh? I thought it was on January 4th"
"Why would you think that? In the email it says January 12th"

It's not good enough that I got the wrong week, but also the wrong day of the week. In fact, it has left me wondering what important event happened on January 4th that I've now missed. And of course...today being the 12th. I am not working. So...in essence I WAS lying....I just didn't know it.

Secondly, to add to my growing fears of early Alzheimer's, my friend is having some minor surgery done on the 26th of January. I had a chance to hang out with him on the weekend and when I was leaving I said, "Well good luck with your surgery, I'm sure I'll talk to you before then though". This is me fully thinking that his surgery was TODAY (i.e. the 12th).

So then I see him online today and I say, "Why aren't you at the hospital?"

"Why? My surgery is on the 26th"

Doh. Idiot.

Ahh yes, no comments

Comment people! I don't write this stuff for nothing!

Another funny mom moment:

We are eating dinner. We have chinese vegetables on the table. I am the only one in the family who prefers eating the leafy parts rather than the shoots/stems.

Mom: You're the odd one.
Me: What? Why??
Mom: I don't mean "odd" as in weird....
Me: Then what do you mean?
Mom: I mean "odd" as in "not even"


P.S. I never got that letter back, the one that was mailed with insufficient postage. Weird....maybe they just mailed it anyways.

THIS is why I'm depressed!